Before I Get 'Seniler'

Be My Valentine

Dear, I want you. Without you my life will never be complete. I need someone that can fold a contour sheet.

The Ugly Kid

The kid was so ugly the mother took off and ain't been heard from since. They hid it behind the backyard fence and the kid got loose and was free to roam until the dog catcher caught it and brought it back home.

The preacher called a town meeting and said, "Let us begin by giving thanks that it wasn't a twin."